Ben Boa’s Life in Pharma

Introduction

This is the first episode of a six-part series about a loveable Aussie rogue called Ben Boa. He is working for a pharmaceutical company as a sales rep. He is getting his first real exposure to the finer points of quality, compliance, and ethics through his bungling antics in trying to get together with a girl.

The series is a pilot for more adventures, as Ben gets mixed up in bribery and corruption scandals reminiscent of those that rocked the world in China's pharmaceutical industry in the nineties.

With a strong element of humour and Australian slang as it develops, I hope you find it interesting to read. Please let me know.

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Ben Boa was talking to his best mate Ernie Fandangle as they were sitting on the train on the way home. “How was the day, Benny Boy?" asked Ernie.

"Well, I had this Ethics training today with Ima Gunnachange from Legal. “Piece of work she is, going on about her ethics and compliance and all that stuff no one cares about anymore. I’ve got to say I just don’t get it!”

“Ima’s really good,” replied Ernie. “It took me a while to get it, and not just because I am a dumb non-technical guy working in accounts. Once you get it, it all makes sense.”

“Well, maybe that’s true,” said Ben. “I don’t care about ethics in this job. I sell products, so why should I care about that? Unless it boosts my sales and bonus, she can go sit on it!"

Suddenly, the train lurched as the brakes stuck when the train slowed down for the station. Ben's cup of coffee went all over this attractive lady sitting across from them. “Uh oh (or words to that effect),” yelled Ben. "I'm so sorry.”

It felt like a slow movie. The coffee spills from the cup as the person about to wear it watches in horror.

Needless to say, the lady was not impressed. If looks could kill, Ben was a dead man walking. After several attempts to appease the woman, all Ben got was her phone number (not all that bad!) and a promise to pay for dry cleaning.

“See Ben, that was an example of poor quality; let me explain ethics to you in 10 words or less," says Ernie.

“This will be good," snipes Ben.

“Ethics is a state of mind; it doesn’t matter if it’s in your work or personal life. It has many parts, but it is a belief. A way of life. If most people have the same attitude, we just need a way to keep moving in that direction and someone to lead. The only other thing we need is a purpose, and that is where the customer comes in. We do all of this to make sure we are always doing better and that the customer is always satisfied. That is the ethical approach. You are lucky that lady didn’t sue your arse off."

“That was way more than 10 words,” says Ben with a smile. “Is that all you got out of that, Ben? You’re hopeless.”

“Get out of her,” replied Ben. "It was an accident, and that was way more than 10 words."

“Yes, but an unethical person wouldn’t see it that way. They would see it as an opportunity to make some money. Didn’t you hear about that lady who sued McDonald's because they served her a cup of coffee without a lid on it? Where was your lid by the way?”

“No, I kind of get it, I think, but what does that have to do with the train and me spilling coffee on my new friend to be?”

“She’s pretty hot, by the way; don’t you think?” added Ben.

“You’re dreaming. She is only hot because you poured your coffee all over her and into her lap.”

"Okay, Smarty pants, so in ten words or less, tell me what ethics is if you are so smart. I have to have something to tell your mate, Ima in tomorrow's training.”

Ethics is “doing the right thing when no one is watching.”

Ben counted out the words on his fingers, swapping his half-empty coffee cup when he got to five.

“I like it, nine words. So you’ve got an answer for everything; sure you don’t work in legal?”

“Tell me about Compliance; that was the other thing Ima got all excited about. What is Compliance?”

“Now that my friend will have to wait, this is my stop. I’ll tell you about compliance tomorrow night. Ten bucks says you don’t hear from the coffee lady.”

“You’re on,” said Ben, “See ya, buddy.”

Till next time,

Calvin

Watch out for Episode 2: Ben’s Hot Date